Does Being a Good Woman Mean Having To Be A Martyr?
Women everywhere have endured pain and suffering caused by betrayal, abuse or other injustice. We’ve used our bodies as carriers to help the creation of tribes and families passing on traditions over generations.
Strong, courageous and good women exist all across the globe. They come from different cultures, backgrounds and socioeconomic levels. The common thread we share is our life experiences with children, partners and career challenges. Innately, we’re nurturers willing to put others first. The needs of our loved ones often take priority. We sacrifice for the love of family. But what happens when we decide to put our needs ahead of others? Does it make us bad people? Do we lose our status as a “good woman” when we don’t abide by the hidden standards outlined by society.
Many of us have at one time or other accepted relationships with people who weren’t up to par with our desires. Choosing to remain with partners that don’t measure up to what we want or deserve. We compromise for the sake of an emotion that makes us do the craziest things. Love is convincing, enticing us to do whatever we can to hold on to it. Or is it possible that deep down, some of us still believe that nice girls don’t speak out of turn? Good girls don’t make demands. We are taught to accept what we’re given without gripes. I will be the first to admit that for much of my life I lived with this idea.
Seeing my own mother become a martyr in her marriage sent mixed signals. It gave me the false belief that a good woman forgives indiscretions, mistreatment and bad behavior. It’s what a woman should do if she loves her husband and wants to keep family together. My adult relationships took a few hits leaving me with a lot to learn. I couldn’t be further from the truth on my assumption. The misconception nearly broke my spirit. At least, it did for a some time. I’d like to think that when one’s spirit is as strong as mine is, you can’t banish it. You can’t destroy it unless I give you permission to do so. I realized that being outspoken in no way reflects on the quality of one’s heart. Forgiveness is a sign of empathy. However, allowing myself to be used as a doormat shows a lack of compassion for self.
It has been a long road to where I am today. A woman who respects herself, values her worth and sees beauty in all that she is. The trials and tribulations have helped empower me. My experiences have helped pinpoint those things I’m not willing to accept. I’ve evolved from all the turmoil and continue to make tweaks as needed in my personal life. Thriving in the knowledge that I don’t have to sacrifice my identity, aspirations or dreams to prove myself as a good woman.
There is great freedom and pride in owning who you are. Bring awareness, value yourself without waiting for others to tell you how amazing you are. There is nothing wrong with considering your needs and prioritizing yourself. You don’t have to be a martyr to show that you are on the good side of life.
“Protected content. 2018 awakened-woman.com”
September 10, 2018 @ 9:18 am
🙌🏼👍🏼
September 11, 2018 @ 2:39 am
Thank you! We really are all have a part on this journey. Thank you for reading. So happy you enjoyed!
Why You Should Join the AW Global Community – awakenedwoman
October 12, 2018 @ 9:04 am
[…] consider the possibilities. A visualization of a global village gathering at Awakened-Woman. Women across the world aiding each other pushing through to the other side of pain. Finding ways to […]
Is Forgiveness Necessary? – awakenedwoman
October 19, 2018 @ 7:42 am
[…] day, I’m a different woman. Thankfully no longer burdened by anger, sadness and bitterness. I’ve freed myself from the […]
How to Calculate Your Self-Worth – awakenedwoman
October 26, 2018 @ 1:27 am
[…] the way we treat ourselves. Set boundaries on what we’re willing to accept from others. Many woman are guilty of doing the same in their lives but it’s time to […]
It’s Your Life, You Can Cry If You Want To. – awakenedwoman
November 11, 2018 @ 9:54 am
[…] and women experience joy and pain throughout their lifetime. While many boys are taught at an early age to […]
Are We All Broken? – awakenedwoman
December 6, 2018 @ 8:49 am
[…] we all broken? I believe so, yes. Men and women alike are imperfect beings flawed in some way. Each of us contributes a personal touch to the […]
How To Stop Attracting the Wrong Men – awakenedwoman
December 19, 2018 @ 12:30 am
[…] Get a Grasp on Your Worth: Do you know your worth? Are you a good woman or a martyr? There isn’t a reason good enough to justify you having to sacrifice yourself. How much you […]
I Dare You to Jump Off in 2019… – AW
December 28, 2018 @ 12:49 am
[…] and women are created equal is the line sold to us. This year has put a spotlight on the disadvantages women […]
As the Year Closes, 2019 will Give Rise to a New Awakening – The Book – AW
December 31, 2018 @ 7:43 pm
[…] you. I hope when you read the book, not only you find it compelling but you will relate to it as a woman. Owning our stories is a powerful way to empower others. Learning the lessons will free us from the […]
How to Effectively Manage the End of a Relationship – AW
January 22, 2019 @ 12:12 am
[…] win for me was in the transformation that came afterwards. I evolved from a girl to an empowered woman. The end of the marriage, as painful as it was gave me one of the most valuable lessons in […]