We’re territorial with our loved ones. Instinct lashes out at anyone who might threaten to take what is “ours.” Whether man or woman in the story. Love gives us the courage to protect those things we hold dear.
But what happens when the person you are being possessive about is no longer in the partnership? Does your ex become fair game after a break up? Is it OK for any of your girlfriends to date the ex-boyfriend or ex-husband?
The level of friendship is irrelevant. The type of romantic relationship that existed with your significant other prior to breakup shouldn’t be a factor in figuring out right from wrong. Once, you’ve carried any type of relationship with someone, the expectation is likely to be “hands off” to friends if there were a split. But how about if a friend is accepting or agreeable of you engaging in romantic gestures with an ex? Would you do it?
The decision to cross the line is not only personal. It’s a matter of respect for yourself and friend. How much is the friendship valued? Are you willing to risk a rift between the two of you? Can the relationship withstand the tension that will arise from a situation such as this one?
Lastly, ask yourself if the love interest presenting themselves as a potential partner is showing you respect? Is it fair for this person to approach you with an offer to engage in a love affair that might hurt you or someone you care about? Looking from this end of the scope, it would look like an act of selfishness and might not be in your best interest, emotionally. Starting a courtship on negativity is setting yourself up for trouble down the road.
So, prior to taking things to that place – ask yourself. How much are you willing to risk to date your friend’s ex? Is it truly worth the price?
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