Have You Lost Your Identity in a Relationship or Motherhood?

“Reclaiming my identity required a reboot. I wasn’t sure where to begin the process. But I knew the journey to my best self would include many questions and tasks to help untangle the mess, I made of myself. I began with these 4 basic but essential steps to begin a foundation for rebuilding. It worked for me, maybe it will help you.”

– Excerpt from ”A Journey to Becoming the Best Self”

Losing your identity in a relationship is one of the easiest things to do as a woman. Falling in love and wanting to be the best partner can lead to putting our needs last. As mothers and wives, it’s natural to have the desire to please those we love, sometimes to our detriment. There is no culpability to assign here because we do it out of love, dedication, and loyalty without asking. Happily relinquishing time, energy, and independence to build homes and relationships, in addition to raising children.

Years ago, I lost myself in marriage and motherhood. I feel grateful for having had a chance to experience an all-consuming love. Today, I have a better balancing act. The sacrifices of the past demonstrate my capacity to love. Although remarkable, it is no way to live an entire existence. I have learned nurturing the relationship with yourself is an integral part of overall wellness.

Losing my identity was not only frustrating. It became an inner struggle that I could not share with anyone. It felt as if I was on an island alone filled with shame. The inability to stand up for myself led to temporary but constant sadness. I knew I had to get out of the cycle for my sake and my child’s benefit. Being true to myself was the only way to get out of the pressure cooker, I created over time. There was no blame to pass because I designed the monster.

If you are battling with how to find yourself again after getting shuffled in the roles of life, there is good news. You can reclaim your identity at any point you decide you are ready. It is never too late to reinvent the wheel or come back home. What are the two most important things you should do to get started on this part of your journey? First, understand that you are not alone in what you are going through, this happens to plenty of women and even, some men. Let go of embarrassing feelings and guilt because this is part of the journey.

Secondly, we learn through living, therefore don’t be scared to feel. Try not to regret the things you have done. If there is something you want to do, now is a good time as any to give it a go! You find out who you are and what you are capable of, and step out of your comfort zone. Make room for activities, hobbies, and possibilities available to you. You may be surprised by what you discover about yourself during this period.

Losing ourselves, whether in motherhood or a relationship does not have to be the end all. Fight for a balance in your life. You are a whole person on your own. Someone who deserves to live a great life, a full one too. You are worthy of happiness, and there is so much joy in being living in your truth. Loved ones should see you – really, see you. More than mommy, spouse, wifey, or bae, you are a woman.

Don’t be afraid to ask yourself hard questions. As an empowered woman, you owe it to yourself to live out loud. The woman is still in there – somewhere. Go get her back!

Protected content. Updated 2023 awakened-woman.com

Photograph by The ABView Photography.