Whatever Happened to Our Fairytale?
Fairytales belong to Disney but somehow many women, myself included have gotten caught up in the fantasy. It’s all Disney’s fault! Ha.
My childhood was filled with Snow White and Cinderella. I couldn’t get enough of the Disney Princesses. I too wished for a prince to save me. Rescue me from life’s heart breaks and disappointments. The search for this mythical man continued into my 30’s. It took time to accept the fact, it wasn’t going to happen because there is no such person.
There was a time, I believed in the fairytale. Prince Charming would come in sweep me off my feet. We would marry and live in eternal bliss. Happiness was tied into unrealistic expectations of love and relationships. Growing up believing that happiness was a destination. A place I’d arrive when the perfect mate would step into my life. The thought that you’ll forever be happy once you are at this place resembling nirvana.
I’ve been married and divorced twice. Although, at one time, these might have been considered failures. I don’t consider myself unlucky at all. To the contrary, I was blessed to have loved and lost because I was able to have some “fairytale moments” throughout the life of these relationships. These brief scenes of life’s most beautiful events sporadically experienced during a span of 20+ years. I’m grateful to have genuine good love. I’ve had an amazing church wedding celebrated with friends and family. The gift of a glorious pregnancy followed by the birth of a daughter. Festive celebrations and holidays filled a home with love, joy and laughter. Moments.
Life isn’t a fable. It’s real messy, at times ugly and beautiful too. We shouldn’t expect to find a perfect mate to wisk us away. Life is a series of adventures. It’s a growth process that takes a human being through hundreds of scenarios testing his or her will, courage and values. Old school folk tales we read as children fill our heads with stories of characters that have no true depth.
Real-life characters are tremendously complicated. Throwing two people together, regardless of gender has challenges. The work to acquire even minimal success in any relationship is tidious as it is constant. There’s no exxageration when I say the fairytale is the wedding then reality sets into the marriage. Everyday routines and problems seep into every relationship. However, it doesn’t mean you can’t have an amazing love. Cherishing the smallest gestures during the span of your time together is truth. Giving eachother a gaze with desiring eyes in a room of strangers is dreamy. Enjoying a moment of laughter or romance is storybook as it brings you closer together.
We don’t get Disney endings but if we’re blessed to find the right partner. We can create magic in loving one another the best way we can. Sharing emotions along with the give and take of this powerful feeling that helps us thrive. Stealing moments meant to stay in our book of love forever, whether or not we remain with that love. Goodness comes in many different ways. Live your story; Believe in it; Love with intent.
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